This week while we talk about taking back our power, I have a cocktail that fits the bill in terms of being sweet, refreshing, and yet packing a punch to help give yourself compassion while you get the strength to reclaim your power back.
Sweet, Yet Strong Peach Tea
1-2 oz Peach Vodka (depends on how much power you want back…just kidding)
Topped with sweet ice peach tea
Sit back and relax and enjoy this week’s blog post!
**To make the sweet tea you can do it two ways:
Quick way: make hot tea using peach flavor tea and add sugar while still hot. To cool add ice, let it sit out, or place in the refrigerator.
Alternative: make sun tea by taking a quart jar and filling with water and 2 teabags of peach favor tea. Sit outside for a few hours, then place in refrigerator to cool down. To sweeten, make a simple syrup by mixing together equal parts sugar and water on the stove, heat until sugar is dissolve – make sure to continually stir. Remove from heat once sugar is dissolve and let cool. Add some of the simple syrup to your tea, around 1/4th of a cup to one-quart tea. Add more or less simple syrup to meet your preference on level of sweetness.
Yesterday was August 15th. Generally speaking, it was just another day in the year – nothing special about it. However, for some the day held significance – something that made that day special. For me, it too held significance, but it was one that was met with sorrow (or did it?). A year ago, on the 15th was the day I met my ex. It would have been our one-year anniversary. The reason that day holds significance is because each month on the 15th I made it a special day – acknowledging how long we had been together by celebrating our commitment to one another. I was so adamant about celebrating our anniversary because he was my first love and my first long term relationship, it was a psychological way of reaffirming myself that this relationship was real as sometimes I was in disbelief. So, although it was “just” another day, it was a day that I placed value on – I gave that day my power. But why am I talking about this day in context to reclaiming my power? Well, let me explain….
How many of you have gone through life and given your power (energy) away, willingly? What I mean by this, is you have allowed an outside factor to influence your day, your mood, your mindset – you gave it value and with that your energy. We have all given our power away either because we wanted too or because we felt pressure too. But why do we do it? That is a question to ask yourself as each person will have a different answer, and in fact several answers for different reasons why.
Over the past few weeks, I had thought about how I was going to handle August 15th – I was making a big deal about that day, putting so much value on it. In fact, I was preparing to have a “poor pitiful me” sympathy party. But something amazing happened!
Over the past few months, as all of you know, I have been working hard at this journey of radical self-love. I was talking to two friends on separate occasions about my fear of being sad on that day. Each friend recommended to me that I did something to change the memory of that day – rewrite the story. Serendipitously, around the same time, I came across this quote on Facebook that said, “laugh in a place that made you once cry and rewrite the story”. It was that moment I consciously made the decision to take back that day as my own and rewrite a new story filled with self-love! I thought of several things I wanted to do. I choose to pamper myself all day! I started off with a massage, got my nails done, bought a new plant, took myself out to lunch, had a nap, watched the movie Soul Surfer, did takeaway for dinner from my favorite Thai restaurant (Sabai), worked on my knitting, and began reading a new book. Those were all things I love to do, and saw as a form of self-love. So, did it work? Did reclaiming the day by doing things that were for self-love work to rewrite the day’s value and story? IT DID! I had such a wonderful day filled with peace, joy, rest, and love.
August 15th once held a special meaning that brought me joy that later brought me sorrow, but instead of allowing the day to remind me of what and who I lost, I took the day and reclaimed it by creating new memories filled with everlasting love and joy. I had honored what the day use to mean, but chose to rewrite, reclaim, and rejoice in a new story.
I mentioned that I watched the movie Soul Surfer. I am a huge surfer fan, along with the ocean and sharks. I chose to watch this movie not only because of those three things, but because of the movie’s message – reclaiming one’s power back. Bethany Hamilton, the person the film is based off of, was born February 8th, 1990 and is an American professional surfer and inspiration to many. Bethany became known to the world because of her 2003 shark attack and her pursuit to overcome that experience. Yesterday I chose to watch the film because Bethany’s journey of personal growth to reclaim her power back from the shark that took her arm and the experience around it, was just the inspiration I needed to help me reclaim mine.
In the film, Bethany struggled and at times was angered at her new identity as someone with just one arm. Feeling defeated by her physical barrier, she willingly gave her power away to the thing that took it – the shark attack. However, one day Bethany no longer wanted to continue giving her power to that traumatic day, she reclaimed her power back by learning how to surf with one arm – no longer fearing the ocean, the shark, and that day. Bethany’s journey was about overcoming and taking her power back from the shark and from the stigmatization of only having one arm. She turned an event that strike fear, into one that allowed her to have a platform to inspire others. At the end of the film she was asked by a reporter “if” she would choose to not surf that day “if” she knew she would become a victim to a shark attack. Bethany answered, that she would not change anything about that day because it has made her who she is, giving her now the ability to inspire others like her.
We can’t change our past, and we can’t continue to say I “should” have done this instead. Our past is what has helped shaped who we are today. When we zoom into an isolated event, sometimes we forget to see the larger picture. How that event or person might have taught us a lesson that feeds into the larger picture of life. The problem that most of us (including myself) continually repeat is we give our power to this one isolated event; we continually hand over our energy which leads to the same outcome – typically feeling hurt or sad. In order to achieve self-love, we can no longer give our power to areas of our past that no longer deserve it. For me, my power was still with a man and an idea of a relationship that no longer exists; I reclaimed, not only the day, but my power that I “gave” him, because he and that day no longer deserve it. This does not mean I do not honor our relationship or even him, but it means I cut the connection and the energy I use to keep fueling his existences and our relationship in my mind. I will always love him, but I am no longer in love with him; I have moved on and am now directing my energy in other ways.
By directing my power toward self-love, self-care, and bettering myself as a person I begin to rewrite pathways in my brain that allow me to be open and ready for new possibilities. What I discovered was that I became free from the “what ifs” and the “should haves” – even if they did pop up, I have learned how to handle those thoughts. Now reclaiming your power does not mean you can’t put energy towards something or someone, it just means that you are conscious of where your energy is going towards, and hopefully will focuses that on energy or events and people who respect it.
I encourage each and everyone one of you warriors to look at where you are investing your power aka energy. Ask questions such as, who am I investing my energy in? What things and/or activities am I investing my energy in? How do I feel when I invest my energy into these people or things? These questions will help highlight areas of your life that you are giving energy too that are no longer serving you. Now, I want to be clear your power and love are two different things. As I mentioned I will always love my ex – love is infinite – but your power is what influences your environment, your thoughts, and your life. Conscious energy creates the nature of reality is a saying I grew up with from my parents – what you focus your energy on will grow. By reclaiming my power/energy back I am now open to explore new possibilities and see areas of my life grow – maybe new love, advance my career, who knows, all I am saying is you can love unlimitedly, but your power/energy is what creates your life.
For now, my warriors – be loved, be kind, and know you are loved!
Until next time…
-Alyssa, the salt woman
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The Salt Road Journey 